Poseidon

2006′s remake of the disaster film Poseidon is a terribly fluffy and dull movie. Essentially, the film follows a group of people that are trying to survive by finding a way out of the sinking luxury liner after it is hit by a huge wave on New Year’s Eve. The special effects aren’t gripping or engaging at all and the entire feel of the huge ship feels somewhat small.

Part of the problem begins with little to no introduction to any characters or to the majesty of this huge ship. Instead, Poseidon starts sinking right after the opening credits roll. The audience gets a small piece of Kurt Russell’s character and his daughter (Emmy Rossum) through their relationship and a slice of Josh Lucas’ Dylan, a gambler type, but those pieces of character development seem like they’d be better left on the cutting room floor. The characters are so dull and uninteresting that they barely even fit stereotypes of who would be on a luxury liner.

And what a luxury liner! Before the great disaster, we are given one sweeping shot of the ship in terrible CGI as Dylan runs around it outside. There are bits of pieces of the interior after that, but most of it feels like it’s in the same room despite having such a large backdrop to work with. Director Wolfgang Peterson simply seems uninterested in the project the entire time, spending little to no time developing any reasons why anyone would care, why anyone’s on the ship and what makes the Poseidon special. Instead, it’s just right in to the “action.”

The action is wobbly and as bland as the characters. It is also often strange and confusing, as it consists of strange ethics of life (characters have no problem and seemingly little remorse for sending a ship employee plummeting to his death, but weep at the prospect of losing people they’ve known for fifteen minutes), bad acting and adventure sequences that lack any flow or real intensity. Instead, the water becomes a non-threat next to death by boredom.

There are a ton of errors in the film, too, that exist almost to demonstrate how little anyone cared about remaking the disaster classic. It all adds up to a sloppy film with little intrigue, adventure, quality of performance and poor direction. Unfortunately, it’s what we’ve come to expect from Wolfgang Peterson.

Trailer: